I get press releases, Volume 4

Well, the folks who sent this to me would submit that it's not a news release, per se. They claim that it's a news feature. I think it sounds more like a news commercial. But you be the judge:

ANTARCTIC SWIMMER LYNNE COX BEATS WINTER SKIN DRYNESS

Risë: WHO KNOWS MORE ABOUT PROTECTING HERSELF FROM COLD WINTER TEMPERATURES, THAN AN ANTARCTIC SWIMMING CHAMP? I'M RISË JILL MILLER.

NINE OUT OF TEN AMERICANS IN A RECENT SURVEY SAY THEY ARE FIGHTING DRY SKIN DURING WINTER MONTHS. OPEN WATER SWIMMER LYNNE COX FACES THE COLD CONSTANTLY, SWIMMING THE ENGLISH CHANNEL TWICE AND EVEN SWIMMING IN THE ANTARCTIC!

Cox: For years I've been trying to find a way to keep my skin moist and protect it from the cold, including the drying effects of winter that we all have to deal with.

COX SAYS SHE FOUND THE ANSWER.

Cox: Believe or not, I recently tried this Advanced Therapy Lotion from Suave and it has been very effective; it really keeps my skin moist. [Mitch's comment: Oh my god! I can't believe that at all! ] It has multi-vitamins and glycerin and it's not at all greasy.

IN ADDITION TO USING MOISTURIZERS, DOCTORS HAVE THIS ADVICE:

FIRST, MAKE SURE YOU AREN'T DEHYDRATED BY DRINKING AT LEAST EIGHT GLASSES OF WATER A DAY. YOU ALSO MIGHT CONSIDER GETTING A HUMIDIFIER TO ADD MOISTURE TO THE AIR IN YOUR HOME OR OFFICE. GET PLENTY OF REST, AVOID LONG HOT BATHS OR SHOWERS, AND EXFOLIATE SKIN TWICE A WEEK.

A hard-hitting news feature, from certain Pulitzer-winner and deep thinker Risë Jill Miller. What it doesn't mention is whether you should exfoliate before or after you swim in the Antarctic, or whether the ten Americans they surveyed also believed the English Channel was also known as "PBS". So we'll want to stay tuned.