If Readers' Digest ever started a vaguely tasteless anecdotes column, I'd have one for them. Maybe they'll send me $300:
So I'm sent on a mission. To Walgreen's. To buy, er, feminine products. It was a big deal early in marriage, as it is with all men, until they finally come to the following important realization:
Hey! Lighten up! The cashier doesn't think they're for you, you stupid idiot!
So as I say, I've done this before, and I always carry a cheat sheet, because God forbid I buy the products with the wrong set of accoutrements. (Yes, I am aware that the accoutrements matter. Forget I mentioned it.) So I'm at the Walgreen's, carefully studying my little scrap of paper and reconciling it against the labels on the 386,295 slightly different-yet-strangely similar-looking feminine hygiene products (flex-wings? dri-weave cover? menthol?) and I look over to my right, and there's another guy, on the same errand. He's wearing a baseball cap and carrying an instrument case which I believe holds a snaredrum. He looks over at me, laughs, and says: "Man, I got my wife's shit memorized!"
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2 comments:
For just that reason, my now-ex husband had no problem picking up "feminine products" but one day ABSOLUTELY REFUSED to pick up pantyhose for me while he was at the store.
That, I guess, COULD be questionable in a clerk's eye....
I never had to purchase a jock strap or anything only for men, so I can only imagine... I suppose it would be similar to having to pick up a pack of adult diapers for your grandmother.
noooo REALLLLY they arent for meeeeeeee....
That's pretty hilarious!
I usually take an empty box of the "feminine product" in question to the store. That way I can make sure the new box matches the old one *exactly*.
Even worse, though, is having to buy makeup. Talk about finding a needle in a haystack...
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